The Farmyard Week 1 Script

Farmer
Well hello boys and girls. How are you doing today?

Wait for it

Farmer
I’m sorry but I didn’t hear you. Can you say hello on the count
of moose? Chicken….cow…moose!

Wait for it.

Farmer
Wow…that was much better. Well I am so glad that you are here
with me today. My name is Farmer Karen and we’re in the Farm
Yard. It is such a great day! We are going to do all kinds of fun stuff….

Phone rings

Farmer
Excuse but I’ve got to answer this….Hello from the Farmyard…this
is Farmer Karen! Yes…okay….that is a problem…well I’ll be right
there. (hangs up) Kids I am so sorry but I have to go feed the pigs…
Kim the farm helper was supposed to, but didn’t, so I have to go
feed them. But first I need my shovel…where oh where is my handy
dandy shovel…mmmm

(looks around up and down while the shovel is obviously right there).

Farmer
Kids have you seen my shovel? Where? Over there? Oh I see…
thanks so much…

About to walk off camera.

Farmer
Oh…could you do me a favor? Usually I wake up Professor Clauu
but I have to go feed the pigs…could you do it for me? Please?!
Thanks! So on the count of duck…you need to yell as loud as you
can “ WAKE UP PROFESSOR CLAUU!”….are you ready! Great…
wait for the animals!…I’ll see you soon!
Pig…horse…duck

WAKE UP PROFESSOR CLAUU!

Clauu
MMM…ayeee…I’ll have a fish sandwich and a large root beer with
extra lemon...huh?..... what?….oh I thought I was at the drive thru.
What was that sound that I heard? mmmm….wow…it sounded like
a bunch of kids are right outside my window

Professor Clauu appears

Clauu
Well….it looks like there are some kids right outside my window.
Brilliant! Hello young people! Thank you for waking me up. I never
seem to be able to wake up from my alarm clock so Farmer Karen
helps me. Where is Farmer Karen? Do you know where she is?
(PAUSE) I’m sorry I couldn’t hear you – where did you say she went?

Kid responses…

Clauu
Oh…she had to go feed the pigs? Interesting…well let me tell you
something interesting about pigs that I found in a library book…
did you know that pigs are very smart animals even though they
seem to be in the mud all the time?! It’s true…they can’t sweat
like you and me so they roll in the mud to cool down. Isn’t that
brilliant that all that rolling around in the mud cools them off – and
I always thought they rolled in the mud cause they liked to be
dirty! ….I read it in an academic book so it’s true! And they can be
great pets…why my uncle Ahab had a pig for a pet…Moby Richard
he called him…oh that Moby Richard…he was a funny pig…always
with the jokes…loved to swim in the pond…I wonder (thinking to
himself)…do you mind if I share something with you? If you are
ready for me to share something, put your hands behind your ears.

Wait for it

Great…well…Yesterday I did something – something that was not
so great. I was hard at work on my latest book when Farmer Karen
asked me to clean up the barn. It is a classified mess. Anyway…I
told her I would clean it up before I went to bed. Well I got so wrapped
up in writing my book that I didn’t do it. And this morning, she asked
me how the cleaning went – and well, I’m embarrassed to tell you, but
I told a lie. I told her the cleaning went great!

Farmer comes back on the scene

Farmer
Hello Professor! So the kids were able to wake you up!

Professor
Oh yes most definitely…they are so nice and understanding. I was
just telling them about something I did that wasn’t so great.
Something I promised to do – but I didn’t do.

Farmer
Oh…about cleaning up the barn.

Clauu
Precisely – so you know about that?. I feel really bad about it.
I am very sure you hate me now because I told a little fib – and
I did not keep my promise to you. Your dislike for me is well earned.

Farmer
Oh professor. I still love you! I wish you would have cleaned the
barn like you promised. I don’t love what you did but I sure
still love you!

Clauu
How could you possibly love me after what I did! How can you look
at me after I have the lie that I told you?

Farmer
(thinking) Professor I think the best thing to do is for us to hear a
story from the Bible to help you understand why I still love you.
Would you like to hear a story from the Bible?

Clauu
Absolutely…I would be stupendously delighted…can I turn on the
farm a tron so the kids can watch too?

Farmer
Yes please

Hits a button and the roof opens up and a big TV screen pops out
for the story.

Illustrated Bible story with a voice over.

Farmer
So professor what do you think?

Clauu
Delightfully educational I do say my dear Farmer Karen. Who
knew that there were yellow pigs with orange spots! Amazingly
informative. Do you suppose yellow pigs with orange spots like to
frolic in the mud?

Farmer
Clauu – I meant what do you think about Rufus, the son that left?

Clauu
I’m a bit surprised actually. He was not a very nice fellow. He
wasted all of his money, he left his father, never wrote, never
called. If I was his father I would have been really mad. But when
he came back all the father wanted to do was have a party because
he was so happy his son had come home.

Farmer
His father loved him so much that even when Rufus did some stuff
that was wrong, his dad still loved him.

Clauu
Correct

Farmer
Well that’s the way that God feels about each and every one of us.
All of us do stuff we shouldn’t from time to time. We may tell a little
lie, or break a promise, or lose our temper with our friend, but God
still loves us. He really does!

Clauu
These young people here look so well behaved, of exceptional
character. Surely they always keep their promises and tell the truth.

Farmer
Well actually, even these kids do things they shouldn’t. . . . . Even
the adults out there watching – sometimes they do things they shouldn’t.

Clauu
Really? So what you are saying is everyone sometimes does stuff
they shouldn’t - but God still loves us – no matter what?

Farmer
Yep! God always loves us – no matter what!

Clauu
That is so educationally cool!

Farmer
So how about you and I clean up this barn together before the
pigs come home!

Clauu
Yes…that is positively a great idea. Did you know that pigs…..fade off

THE END

some meeting notes

Planet Roughs

It'll make sense in week 7 of Space Chickens...which may
or may not calm your fears...

Space Chickens Week 6

Warm up

Space Chickens Week 5

Space Chickens Week 4

Stranger than Fiction

It's a great movie...the last narrative was awesome...so for posterity
I wroteit down...don't read if you haven't seen the movie! It's taken
out of context so it won't make much sense...

As Harold took a bite of Bavarian sugar cookie he finally had the
feeling that everything was going to be okay. Sometimes we lose
ourselves in fear and despair, in routine and constancy, in
hopelessness and tragedy. We can thank God for Bavarian sugar
cookies, and fortunately when there aren't any cookies we can still
find reassurance in a familar hand on our skin. Or a kind and loving
gesture. Or a subtle encouragement. Or a loving embrace. Or an
offer of comfort, not to mention hospital gurneys or nose plugs and
uneaten danish, soft spoken secrets, and fender strata casters and
maybe the occassional piece of fiction. And we must remember that
all these things, the nuances, the anamolies, the sublties, which we
assume only accessorize our days are in fact here for a much larger
and nobler cause. They are here to save our lives. I know the idea
seems strange, but I also know that it so happens to be true.

Vacation!

Had a great time down in South Carolina with the wife
and kid. Also had a bunch of time to draw and work on
the monkey story. It was really nice to be able to dig into
the story and think from the perspective of a monkey
family so that the illustrations would show what a monkey
family living would look like...not just monkeys living like
people. I know it sounds crazy...but it was fun.

The other nice thing was an almost complete disconnection
from the rest of the world. No internet, no email...only a
few phone calls. It was very quiet. I like quiet.

The part of the creative process small children shouldn't see

So the "Farm Yard video shoot is tomorrow and one of the puppets is
"Hermie"...Brissie was hard at work on Professor Clauu (pictures coming
soon) so I had to tackle Hermie myself.

As you can see...several stuffed animals were mangled in the process...but
if this violence in any way shape or form brings kids closer to Christ...I will
put it in the "okay" category...any other reason is just plain wasteful of the
stuff animal population.

Paige all done!

So I think I'm done...but I'll probably spot something else

to tweak the next time I look at it. So for now...it's done.

Goodness

Can't believe it's been over a week...have been cranking on a bunch of

projects that have nothing to do with drawing...the farm yard shoot is

next week so I should post some of those scripts....anyway...some

meeting scribbles.